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Intended title: Thomas M. Cipriano

 In progress {{multiple issues |cleanup=July 2011 |confusing=July 2011 |deadend=July 2011 |essay-like=July 2011}} examplefarm unreferenced 2007

Thomas M. Cipriano
BornMarch 26, 1966
Philadelphia, PA
Other namesCaptain Janks
Occupation(s)Gas station attendant
shipping clerk
plastics manufacturing
Known forPrank calls

Thomas M. Cipriano, (born March 26, 1966) better known as Captain Janks, places prank calls to live radio and television programs, especially during breaking news events and crises. He frequently has the recorded calls played on The Howard Stern Show, and has released collections of calls on tape, CD, and DVD.

Biography[edit]

Cipriano[1] was born in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania and was adopted; his biological mother was 14 years old at his birth.[2] When he started calling the Stern show in 1989, he was living with his parents.[3] Cipriano has worked as a shipping clerk, then as a gas station attendant[2] in North Wales, Pennsylvania as of 2006,[4] and as of 2011, in "plastics manufacturing".[5] Cipriano took his "Captain Janks" nickname from the name and rank of his commanding officer in the U.S. Army.[6][2]

As Janks' pranking career grew, he made public appearances, including hosting karaoke nights,[7][8] and had a "farewell appearance" on the Stern show December 1, 2005.[1]

In December 2005, Janks was mugged, and Dan Gross of the Philadelphia Daily News wrote "TV newscasters nationwide might celebrate the fact that North Wales' Tom Cipriano was mugged Thursday in New York" of a carry bag of DVDs and his cell phone.[9]

Janks was accused in 2009 of allegedly booking performances, getting paid in advance, and not showing, by several bar owners, and investigated by Howard 100 News.[10] Stern confronted Cipriano on air in early 2009 about his integrity about showing up for appearances, and drug use.[11] In April, Cipriano was arrested[12] and faced charges of allegedly defrauding bar owners out of prepaid appearances.[13] His lawyer reported getting "prank phone calls demanding reimbursement" from, for example, Pittsburgh, Texas.[14] Cipriano pled not guilty and requested dismissal,[15] but later pled guilty and was sentenced to 8 years' court supervision, full restitution, and continued sobriety from an oxycontin addiction.[11]

Pranking[edit]

When Howard Stern began syndicating his radio show to Philadelphia, he would trash-talk the competing local morning zoo show hosted by John DeBella on WMMR, as he had always done. But live syndication let Stern trash the show in "realtime" (Stern could hear DeBella's show live).[16] As author Matthew Hoffman describes it, "Stern's efforts to contact DeBella by phone inspired one peculiarly monomaniacal listener to join the ranks of the cranks": this was Cipriano,[16] who made the "zookeeper" his "first target."[2] Janks would send in tapes to the Stern Show of him mocking and taunting DeBella about his baldness, among other comments.[16][17] Janks is considered a Wack Packer.

Stern credits Janks with the first Howard Stern fake phone call in 1989 to the CNN Larry King Show[18] in his books Private Parts[6] and Miss America.[3]

After pranking since 1989, Cipriano was the "Dial-A-Date" prize in 1992 for Annette DeBella, the ex-wife of vanquished Philadelphia radio host John DeBella,[19] some time before her suicide in October of that year.[20]

In 1992, Andy Bloom, then program director at KLSX-FM Los Angeles which carried the Stern show, said it all started with "Tom Cipriano, a 26-year-old shipping clerk from Philadelphia whose "nom de phone" is 'Capt. Janks.'"[21] Cipriano counted "about 1,000" phone calls [from 1990-92], costing $300-$400 per month." Bloom stated, "(Cipriano) does not work for us [or] Stern and is not encouraged to do any of the things he does."[21] Cipriano stated "I'm doing it because I admire Howard so much and I'd like to contribute any possible way I can."[21] Cipriano gives the call screeners on the various shows "a relatively innocuous - but logical - question for the on-air guest", but when on the air, brings up Howard Stern.[21]

Janks is not alone in pranking for Stern. The book Stern A-Z lists other Stern contributors who act as "phony phone callers", including "The King of All Messengers, Ponce de la Phone, King of all Rednecks, King of Cable, King of all Messy Pants, Maury, and Stern's daughter Emily."[22]

In a review of another prank call group, Victor Lewis-Smith of the Evening Standard (London, England) recalled his job at BBC Radio 1 as a presenter making spoof calls, and reviewed Captain Janks:

"Like all forms of practical joke, making successful spoof calls is a harder process than it seems, requiring targets who deserve to be lampooned, and a mixture of careful planning and inspired improvisation in their execution; and above all, the results need to be funny, because humour is ultimately the only justification for the deception. Americans have long excelled at this craft, with Howard Stern, Captain Janks and The Jerky Boys being some of the best exponents."[23]

Richard Roeper blamed call screeners in 2003 for prankers getting through. About Janks' prank on Dan Rather, he wrote "the real fault lies with whoever took Janks' call and called him back at his home--which has a Pennsylvania area code--and yet still believed the guy was an eyewitness in Texas."[24] At the time, Cipriano stated, "I gave them my phone number here in Pennsylvania -- I mean, if I'm from Texas, then why are they calling Pennsylvania?"[25]

A New York Post article about prankers including Janks describes call screeners as "overburdened and generally young producers assigned to act as gate-keepers", whose tools include "simply to ask would-be callers for their phone number and make sure the area code matches up with where they say they're calling from." An ABC News spokeswoman stated, "With breaking news we make every effort to ensure the credibility of the witness before we put them on the air, but in live events, screening processes are not 100 percent effective." An "industry vet" stated, "At the very least you can catch 90 percent of them by getting their number and calling them back, generally they freak or give you a phony phone number." Other techniques described "include grilling the caller on little known facts about the situation or organization they claim to represent."[26]

Janks is usually able to get on the air, but not always: in 2004, while on-air with Howard Stern, Janks tried to get on WHYY-FM's Radio Times With Marty Moss-Coane; Janks mentioned Moss-Coane to Stern, which may have tipped off a listening call screener, who "came back on the line and called him an 'a--hole' before cutting him off."[27]

According to Howard 100 News reporter Steve Langford, "Captain Janks knows more about journalism than anybody else, and should teach journalism professionally. The only problem with that according to Chris Matthews is that Janks cannot read or write."[citation needed]

Due to phone pranks from Janks in February 2004, Philadelphia's 6ABC-TV added a 5-second delay to its Sunday Live broadcasts a month later,[28][29] but Janks' "F*CK the FCC" went through anyways, with a slight silence preceding it.[30]

On the tenth anniversary of Janks' 2003 on-air call to ESPN as Chicago Cubs fan Steve Bartman, radio host Dan Patrick replayed the call, and discussed the prank with Janks on air. Janks revealed that prior to the call, he did research via email with Bartman, and got through because ESPN had been trying to reach Bartman. Janks stated:

“What you consider to be one of the worst moments of your career I consider to be one of the best moments of my prank phone calling career".[31][32][33]

Releases[edit]

  • 1990-93: Scams-O-Plenty (Three 90-min cassettes - self-published).[21] Vol. I (1990), Vol. II (1992), Vol. III (1993).[34]
  • 1994: Phoney Phone Calls (CD/Cassette - Atlantic Records)[35]
  • 1996: The King of the Cranks (CD - Ozone Music). Liner notes: Howard Stern.[36]
  • 2005: Phoney Calls (DVD - self-published).[37][9]
Richard Dye of Philadelphia Magazine found some parts "repugnant", but when co-host Kerri-Lee Halkett of Fox’s Good Day Philadelphia "asks serious follow-ups after Janks says Stern’s dog pooped on the runways at Philly International, it’s hard not to laugh." Rys gave the DVD a grade of "C+".[37]

Notable prank calls[edit]

1991[edit]

Janks got on the air with Jerry Lewis during Lewis' 1991 Labor Day Muscular Dystrophy Association Telethon, claiming to be Larry King. Immediately upon being put on the air, Janks stated "what do you think of Howard Stern, the radio personality? How do you like them apples?" Lewis replied "I don't think we got Larry King, no. I think it was a phony."[38][39] Howard Stern described this call as Janks' "greatest achievement" in Private Parts (1993)[6] and as "the most elaborate prank Janks ever pulled" in Miss America (1995).[38]

Janks repeatedly called into Larry King Live on CNN with the objective of getting "Howard Stern!" on the air. In one sequence when Donny Osmond was the guest, callers including Janks mentioned Stern, leading King to state "there's a bunch of sickies out there tonight having fun with us."[21][39] Later, Janks switched to yelling "Baba Booey, Baba Booey!" instead, because "hosts weren't as quick to cut him off"; when he did this to Larry King, he "didn't hang up on him. He just stared into the screen, his eyes wide and confused behind those glasses, and said, 'I don't understand.'"[40] In another call, Janks asked King "why can't you stay married?" to which King simply replied, "I don't know."[41]

1994[edit]

During CNN coverage of the 1994 Northridge earthquake, Janks, as a spokeswoman for the "San Fernando Valley Fire Department", told anchor Bernard Shaw that residents were advised to stay indoors, and to call a toll-free number, "for Howard Stern's 1994 New Year's Eve pay-per-view special, okay Bernard?"[42][43]

1995[edit]

In perhaps his most famous call, Janks got on the air with the United Cerebral Palsy Telethon in the mid-90's pretending to be Kathie Lee Gifford. After stating "she" wanted to make a $500 donation, that is a $500,000 donation, "Kathie" claimed she had a "confession" to make: that she wanted to "make hot monkey love to Howard Stern."[44] Cipriano spoke at the 1996 "Talk Radio Seminar" sponsored by trade magazine Radio & Records, about how he "crashes through" call screeners, particularly Larry King's, and showed videotape of his "Kathie Lee" call to the telethon.[45] Janks called the Stern show on January 20, 2005, the "tenth anniversary" of the call.[46]

1996[edit]

Janks impersonated then-mayor of Philadelphia Ed Rendell when pranking Rosie O'Donnell the day her show, The Rosie O'Donnell Show, debuted in that city in 1996. Janks stated "Howard Stern says you're a fat pig, you know that?" and called O'Donnell a "fat pig" twice more before being disconnected. Since the broadcast was live, on the east coast, the remarks could not be edited from the show.[41][47]

Janks called into Chuck Woolery's The Home and Family Show posing as Woolery, who was recovering after heart surgery, and stating that "Rick Dees blows and Howard Stern rules" (Dees was a guest on the show that day). Janks revealed this call after he won the Stern show's 1996 "Best Phony Phone Call of The Year" for a call into the CP telethon as Kathie Lee.[48][citation needed]

1997[edit]

Janks called into MSNBC during its coverage of the 1997 car crash that resulted in the death of Princess Diana. Posing as Christopher Dickey, bureau chief of Newsweek magazine, he told Brian Williams that Diana had ordered the driver to go faster, to reach a video store to rent Private Parts before the store closed.[49][50] Williams let Janks stay on to repeat the statement, commenting that it seemed different than other reports, before the call was cut off.[50]

1998[edit]

Janks has slipped onto the Mother Angelica Live show several times, asking her if she would "spread for Baba Booey" and if she would "pray for Baba Booey's big fat ass."[51][citation needed]

1999[edit]

During coverage of the 1999 Columbine disaster in Littleton, Colorado, Janks called KUSA-TV, in Denver, posing as a hospital spokeswoman. Janks said, "So far it is 18 people that are critically injured. We don't know much more past that. We do know one thing; the gunman was Howard Stern. He was shooting up the whole school. It was ridiculous. He was angry because no one was watching his Saturday night television show."[52][53]

Janks pretended to be Coast Guard Lt. Ed Gaynor during coverage of the disappearance of John Kennedy Jr.'s plane in 1999, telling MSNBC's Soledad O'Brien that Stern "thinks you're a whore". "Gaynor" also informed Dan Rather at CBS that debris from a Piper Saratoga had been found, as had "Baba Booey's teeth", and Stern was there. Rather missed the Howard Stern references and continued to treat Janks as a legitimate caller until producers cut him off. Rather didn't acknowledge that Janks may have been a prank caller until Bob Orr told him on air that it was a "prankster". Rather conceded only a "fairly strong reason to believe" that Janks was a crank caller. "Gaynor" on ABC asked Peter Jennings if he knew that "Howard Stern thinks you're a dick," but Jennings rebuffed "[This] happens on every crisis in America. Someone representing the disc jockey Howard Stern gets through. It happens, and it passes."[54][55][56]

2002[edit]

During the July 30, 2002 Kensington, Maryland Amtrak derailment[57] coverage on NBC with anchor Greg Jarrett, Janks called in as a witness to the derailment, mentioning Stern's name several times.[58][59] It was played on The Howard Stern Show in July 2002[60] and December 2006.[61]

2003[edit]

During coverage of the Space Shuttle Columbia disaster on February 1, 2003,

  • Janks fooled CBS anchors Dan Rather and Russ Mitchell by saying he was a resident of Texas and that he had found debris the size of the teeth of Baba Booey. Despite Mitchell stating that the caller was a prank, Rather didn't immediately realize it was a prank call until Janks asked "You know you're an idiot, Dan?", at which point he was cut off. Rather conceded that "I am an idiot, but that's beside the point" and offered an "abject apology" to the viewers for the call.[24][62][25]
  • Janks also called into live MSNBC coverage of the crash claiming to be NASA spokesperson John Ira Petty. When asked about the disaster, he said "it appears to have uhm...exploded been shot down by Jackie Martling when he thought Howard Stern was on board."[63][25]

Janks, impersonating Dexter Filkins of the New York Times, called Chris Matthews in 2003 during the height of the Iraq War after the takeover of Saddam International Airport. He said the Iraqi people were asking for tapes of The Howard Stern Show, and Matthews responded, "You're kidding!" Janks explained on the Stern show that he created the effect of calling from around the world by pausing before answering questions and holding the phone close to a radio that was tuned to static.[64][65][citation needed]

Janks pranked Dan Rather again by imitating CBS News general assignment reporter[66] Jim Axelrod, who was embedded with the 3rd Infantry Division following the start of Operation Iraqi Freedom -- the report was actually broadcast on a bottom-screen scroll until it was discovered to be a prank and removed.[citation needed]

Janks posed as Con Ed representative "Joe Petta" during coverage of the Northeast Blackout of 2003, and asked CNN's Carol Costello "Would you bang Howard Stern?"

During coverage of the 2003 brush fire in San Diego, Janks posed as Mayor Dick Murphy, stating to Daryn Kagan of CNN that three people were in custody in connection with the fires and that they were "caused by a blast of wind from Howard Stern's asshole."

Janks called into ESPN posing as Steve Bartman, the Chicago Cubs fan infamous for the foul ball he caught October 14, 2003, that possibly cost the Cubs a trip to the World Series. After "apologizing" to everyone involved, Janks asked Dan Patrick "do you like Howard Stern's butt cheese?" Patrick responded, "We've been had."[67][68][69][70][61] This call received a Howard Stern "F-Emmy" award, as "Best Phony Phone Call to a Television Host" in November 2003; Dan Patrick graciously accepted the award by phone, stating he was a fan of the show and "really wanted to crawl under the desk when that call happened" with 45 minutes of show remaining to do.[71] Austin O'Connor of The Sun (Lowell, MA) expressed appreciation for the prank.[72]

Shortly after the death of Bob Hope in 2003, Janks called CNN impersonating comedy writer Gene Perret, and said that Hope "was the best, the best boss one could ever have. He died choking on Howard Stern's ballsack."[73][74] Janks also "hit" Fox's nationwide "Good Day Live", asking Steve Edwards, "Would you like Howard Stern's balls on your chin?" and called him a "jerkoff."[75] The American Reporter editor-in-chief Joe Shea wrote, "Bob would have loved it."[76] The tape of the call was played on the Stern show during a "tribute" for Janks prior to his hernia surgery in 2005.[77]

2004[edit]

On CNN, during a news story on Iraq, anchor Daryn Kagan welcomed Brigadier General Mark Hurtland back to the show; he had been on air in the previous hour. But now, it was Janks, posing as the general. When Kagan asked about security in Baghdad on an upcoming religious holiday, "Hurtland" asked, "Would you bang Howard Stern?"[78][79]

During coverage of the 2004 Hurricane Charley, Janks called CNN posing as Gary Vickers, an official with the Florida State Emergency Center, and said there had been evacuations from Fort Myers all the way to Manatee County, urged people not wait it out as Charley was a Category 4 and a finger of God, and "a blast of wind from Howard Stern's ass."[80][81]

Janks has made many calls to local Philadelphia TV stations:

  • Following the deadly Tropicana parking garage collapse in Atlantic City (2003),[82] Janks got on Philadelphia's NBC-10 (during sweeps week) as the CEO of Keating Building Corp. When anchor Tim Lake queried the cause of the collapse, "Keating" blamed a "cannonball fired by Howard Stern". Lake then "muttered something aloud directed at producers who had let the call through."[83]
  • Janks called WPVI, and got on the air as "Frank Graft" of PennDOT with anchor Marc Howard to advise of closures on I-95 and I-476 because of "slippery roadway conditions and also Howard Stern's book Miss America laying all over the roadway."[citation needed]
  • He also called WCAU's Homework Helpline posing as a young man who asked "What's the square root of Howard Stern's asshole?"[citation needed]

When the Stern Show broadcast from Las Vegas in 2004, Janks called into local stations to claim that then-cast member Artie Lange had died. KLAS-TV "confirmed the death" with Lange's hotel, the Hard Rock, then reported it via email, its website (and on-air[84]), and later retracted it.[85][86][87] Radio station KNUU-AM also picked up the story.[88] The Las Vegas Metropolitan Police Department "found the hoax 'not very funny'".[86] Stern discussed the hoax on air the next morning[89] and Janks took credit the day after that.[90]

2006[edit]

Janks called into Wolf Blitzer's The Situation Room on CNN on August 23, 2006, claiming to be Wendy Hutchens, and said that she had chatted about the death of JonBenét Ramsey with a suspect in her murder, John Mark Karr. When asked, "When did the talk of JonBenet Ramsey begin" by Blitzer, "Hutchens" answered, "It started around September of 2001, when he told me that he knew more about the JonBenet Ramsey case than what anybody else had known - and that he was instructed to kill JonBenet by Howard Stern."[4][91]

2010[edit]

Early in the year, Janks called ESPN's "SportsCenter" posing as former Philadelphia wide receiver, Brian Westbrook, recently released from the Philadelphia Eagles. "Westbrook" told host Scott Van Pelt that he was "looking forward to a future of worshipping the prostate of Howard Stern". After the call was cut off, Van Pelt ultimately said, "Hi, YouTube."[92][93]

2011[edit]

In November, Janks called CNN anchor Fredricka Whitfield as Gregory Porter, a Cairo University exchange students freed[94] by the Egyptian government; he invoked "Baba Booey’s monkey nuts".[95][96]

At WRAL-TV in Raleigh, North Carolina during Hurricane Irene reportage, anchors Pam Saulsby and Bill Leslie took Janks to be "Ernie Seneca", spokesman for North Carolina Emergency Management, who stated, "the storm is caused by a draft of wind from Howard Stern’s [ass]."[97] Janks similarly pranked CBS 3 in Philadelphia and CBS 2 in New York, the same weekend.[98][5]

2012[edit]

Following the Aurora, Colorado theatre shootings, Janks, as police captain "Dan Oates", fooled a KUSA-TV "TV anchorwoman with false death toll claims"[99] and said "the last shooting victim 'was actually very angry because he lost on ‘America’s Got Talent’ and Howard Stern voted him down.'"[100]

Janks reportedly did no phone pranking during Hurricane Sandy, stating, "I didn't want all of New Jersey hating me. The entire tristate area."[101]

2013[edit]

In February 2013, during live TV coverage of the Los Angeles Police Department’s standoff with a man believed to be suspected triple-murderer Christopher Dorner, Janks pretended to be "Mike Taugher" from the "California Fish and Game Department". "Taugher" reported live on CBS 2, "[...] We believe it was 'Ronnie the Limo Driver' firing at Mr. Dorner and we believe that he hit him." Under the live helicopter video feed of the forest cabin, the caption showed Taugher's name erroneously credited "U.S. Fish and Game".[102][103]

References[edit]

  1. ^ a b Jordan, Tracy (April 30, 2009). "Montco comedian could face serious jail time". The Morning Call (PA). Retrieved November 30, 2012.
  2. ^ a b c d Lucaire, Luigi (1997). Howard Stern A To Z. St. Martin's Griffin. ISBN 978-0312151447. p. 35. Retrieved November 30, 2012.
  3. ^ a b Stern, Howard (1996). Miss America. Harper. p. 443. ISBN 978-0061095504. Retrieved November 30, 2012.
  4. ^ a b Grove, Lloyd; Thomson, Katherine (August 24, 2006). "JonBenet prankster blitzes Wolf". New York Daily News – via ProQuest (subscription required) . p. 26. Quote: "Yesterday, the notorious prank caller and Howard Stern fan - real identity: North Wales, Pa., gas-station employee Thomas Cipriano - scammed his way onto CNN's "The Situation Room." In a live 4 p.m. phone interview with star anchor Wolf Blitzer (below), Cipriano impersonated Wendy Hutchens, a California woman who claims that five years ago she had detailed chats about the death of JonBenet Ramsey with creepy murder suspect John Mark Karr. [...] Blitzer, poker-faced, ended the interview: "All right. Well, that sounds like we've just been Howard Sterned, as they say." A CNN spokeswoman told me sheepishly: "We make every effort to screen all of our guests, and we're looking into this incident." Cipriano, meanwhile, told me he hatched the scheme early yesterday afternoon and was surprised at how easily he succeeded - first impersonating Hutchens' alleged publicist, "Bob Fortello," and then arranging for "Hutchens" to phone the control room directly and give the password "blue." "I've been doing this for 20 years!" Cipriano marveled. "You'd think they'd be on to me by now."
  5. ^ a b Gross, Dan (August 29, 2011). "Dan Gross: Stern prankster's CBS Irene punk". The Philadelphia Inquirer. philly.com. Retrieved 2012-12-02.
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  8. ^ Gross, Dan (May 19, 2005). "Oldest Video Store Closing". Philadelphia Daily News. Retrieved 2013-12-03. North Wales' Tom Cipriano, better known as Capt. Janks, the prank caller who's a regular on Howard Stern's radio show, will host karaoke night at the Smoked Joint (1420 Locust) Tuesday. Janks will ask Stern trivia questions and hand out CDs of what he calls his greatest hits. The gas-station attendant likes to call live TV newscasts pretending to be an expert of some kind who then either sexually harasses a female anchor or blathers on about Stern and how he rules. Janks will also make crank calls for fans to their friends or family. – via NewsBank (subscription required)
  9. ^ a b Gross, Dan (December 6, 2005). "Captain Janks mugged". "The Public Eye", Philadelphia Daily News – via NewsBank (subscription required) . p. 45. Retrieved November 30, 2012.
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  13. ^ Hessler Jr., Carl (July 2, 2009). "Howard Stern prankster Captain Janks faces trial". thereporteronline.com. The Journal Register company. Retrieved 2012-11-28.
  14. ^ Orenstein, Robert H. (July 19, 2009). "Capt. Janks' lawyer getting prank reimbursement calls". The Morning Call (PA). Retrieved 2012-12-02.
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External links[edit]

[[Category:Living people]] [[Category:American radio personalities]] [[Category:The Wack Pack]]