Wikipedia:Peer review/The Beatles/archive1

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The Beatles[edit]

This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because…

It's a vital article to Wikipedia and to WP:TB (Beatles wikiproject), and, IMO, isn't far from a FA. Just need some direction, that's all.

Thanks, Cheers, Kodster (Willis) (Look what I can do) 19:42, 21 April 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Ruhrfisch comments: Very interesting article, but I agree it could be improved and here are my suggestions:

  • I think for such a long and detailed article, the lead needs to be expanded. My rule of thumb is that if it is a section header it should be in the lead. See WP:LEAD
  • The Wikipedia:Manual of Style (headings) also recommends not using the article title in headers (although if the album The Beatles were a heading that would be OK). So "1960–70: The Beatles " could just be "1960–70"
    • done
  • I like the Beatles and know something about them, although I learned a lot reading this. I think that one problem this has is relative weight for the various topics. For example, do we really need all the detail on every name they ever had or thought about in the "1957–60: Formation" section, but no mention of the films A Hard Day's Night or Help in "1960–70: The Beatles". The Hamburg section also seems relatively large. See WP:WEIGHT
  • There are several one or two sentence paragraphs that should be expanded or merged into other paragraphs
  • Make sure things are in context - for example "NEMS" is used before "North End Music Store (NEMS)" explains it, or when the Beatles come to America we are told "where they first met Murray the K", but I think would help to add "DJ" - see WP:PCR
  • "Musical evolution" seems to focus just on 1965 to 1967, but as the article is on their whole career I think it should start from the beginning (covers etc) and go all the way to the end.
  • Achievements section seems like it would go better at the end. At FAC there might be some who call it a Trivia section, which is a no no.
  • I owuld put the more text-y things like On film and Song catalogue before more list-y things
  • A model article is often useful - there are several FAs on musical groups that would be helpful.

Hope this helps, Ruhrfisch ><>°° 01:43, 26 April 2008 (UTC)[reply]