Talk:Hudson River/GA2

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Reviewer: Mike Christie (talk · contribs) 10:00, 6 March 2018 (UTC)[reply]

I'll review this. Mike Christie (talk - contribs - library) 10:00, 6 March 2018 (UTC)[reply]

I'll copyedit as I go through; please revert if I make a mess of anything.

  • A couple of points that are not an issue for GA, but which I may as well mention:
    • There are two dead links you may wish to fix, in footnotes 28 and 82.
    • Any reason to have just a single citation in the lead? It's not on a particularly controversial point.
      • Content now also included in the geology section. Reference in lead removed. PointsofNoReturn (talk) 01:56, 8 March 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • Earwig complains about "The river carries an abundance of suspended sediments, mainly clays eroded from glacial deposits and organic particles. Unlike most other US estuaries, the Hudson has a relatively youthful erosional history, so it does not have a large depositional plain near its mouth. Around New York Harbor, sediment also flows from the ocean to within the estuary by its upcurrent flow"; can you paraphrase this a little more?
  • There's a {{cn}} tag in the "Sources" section, and a few others further down the article.
    • That should take care of the citation needed tags. New references have been added, and tags have been removed. PointsofNoReturn (talk) 21:22, 25 March 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • The first two paragraphs of the "Sources" section seem to contradict each other. By "cartographically" I assume you mean "on maps"; the second paragraph says the USGS contradicts what you state as fact in the first paragraph. I looked at our article on Lake Tear of the Clouds, and it cites the USGS for a wording that seems to correspond with the first paragraph, not the second. The first paragraph of the "Upper Hudson River" restates the "name on maps" point yet again. I think all this could be compressed a bit.
    Struck, since you've fixed the contradiction; I still think it's a bit wordy but this is good enough for GA. Mike Christie (talk - contribs - library) 18:14, 25 March 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • Flight 1549 landing on the waters of the Hudson River: the caption needs tweaking as the plane is clearly not in the act of landing; there are people standing on the wings.
  • Suggest linking Mahican on first use.
  • The Hudson is often mistaken for one of the largest rivers in the United States, but it is an estuary throughout most of its length below Troy: what does "largest" mean? Longest? Water discharge volume?
    • Sentence removed as part of large-scale rewrite of that paragraph, including new refs. PointsofNoReturn (talk) 22:46, 24 March 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • The information about fresh water fraction appears to contradict itself; the mean number cited is larger than the previous number, the definition of which is not clear.
  • The description of "World's End" as the deepest part is given twice, in different sections.
    • I'd argue that it is preferable that way so that the reader sees it in the context of the course of the river as well as a summary of its geography. If I had to remove one, I would remove it from the course section. PointsofNoReturn (talk) 23:46, 10 March 2018 (UTC)[reply]
      OK, so long as there's a good reason that's fine. Mike Christie (talk - contribs - library) 12:39, 11 March 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • The section on the Hudson River School should give some date context.
  • as trains and automobiles were still being developed: true for trains, but automobiles came much later.
    • Clarified the statement to say that automobiles were roughly a century away. PointsofNoReturn (talk) 23:56, 10 March 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • When the Erie Canal is first mentioned you don't explicitly say where it joins the Hudson, or even that it joins the Hudson at all.
    • Context added to make it clear that the canal gets you from the Great Lakes to the Hudson River. PointsofNoReturn (talk) 00:02, 11 March 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • Numerous landmarks have been constructed along the Hudson: odd way to phrase it; they weren't built as landmarks. How about something like "Many of the buildings of the Hudson are now well-known landmarks"?
    • Changed to "Numerous places have been constructed along the Hudson that have since become landmarks."
  • Other unique fish found in the river: does "unique" here just mean "unusual"? If so I'd change it to avoid confusion; there are no other unique fish previously mentioned.
  • What makes offshoreblue.com a reliable source?
    • Source replaced with three new sources for the 3 parts of the sentence. PointsofNoReturn (talk) 17:19, 14 March 2018 (UTC)[reply]

-- Mike Christie (talk - contribs - library) 01:47, 7 March 2018 (UTC)[reply]

I see a lot of progress has been made; I've struck the points that have been addressed. Mike Christie (talk - contribs - library) 12:39, 11 March 2018 (UTC)[reply]
PointsofNoReturn, just checking in -- are you still working on this? Not much left to fix now. Mike Christie (talk - contribs - library) 10:09, 21 March 2018 (UTC)[reply]
I apologize for the delay. I am a student and unfortunately my coursework has prevented me from having much free time for the past week and change. My plan is to plough through the rest of the review by the end of Thursday or Friday. I appreciate the reminder. PointsofNoReturn (talk) 13:04, 21 March 2018 (UTC)[reply]
No worries; so long as I know you're working on this we can keep it open. If you need more time just let me know. Mike Christie (talk - contribs - library) 13:05, 21 March 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Just the citation needed tag in the "Sources" section left to fix and then I'll promote this. Mike Christie (talk - contribs - library) 18:15, 25 March 2018 (UTC)[reply]

The last tag has been removed. Thank you for your patience in reviewing this article. Also, thank you for the thorough recommendations you made for improving this article. PointsofNoReturn (talk) 21:22, 25 March 2018 (UTC)[reply]
Promoting to GA. Congratulations! Mike Christie (talk - contribs - library) 21:40, 25 March 2018 (UTC)[reply]
PointsofNoReturn, by the way, the bot that notifies you it's passed will probably say it's failed; it's a bug in the bot whenever there's a previous fail. Just ignore the message; it's passed. Mike Christie (talk - contribs - library) 21:46, 25 March 2018 (UTC)[reply]
All good. Thanks for the info, and thanks again for the review. PointsofNoReturn (talk) 02:42, 26 March 2018 (UTC)[reply]
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