User:OliW1730/sandbox

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Tom Wood (1984 - )[edit]

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopaedia

Thomas "Tom" Wood (born Lincolnshire, on some distant date) was a teacher working in London, particularly Haringey (2008-2012). He is also known to play bass, ride various forms of ridiculous transportation see below and owns an expensive road bike which he rarely uses.

History[edit]

Some people have often wondered about the history of T. Wood. Being of gigantic proportions it has even been mentioned that the Wood family name is a reference to the Ent like origins of his family. Wikipedia is unable to verify this.

It is a little known fact that Tom is obsessed with stick insects and spends hours breeding them in his laboratory. Many a time a student has picked up a pencil only to find it oozing stick insect faeces instead of graphite. Surprisingly this leaves a wonderfully supple mark on 80gsm cartridge paper, somewhere between a HB & 3HB pencil. It is hoped the marketing of this stick-shit will make Tom rich in the future. There is circumstantial evidence to support this - for several years Tom has gone on a research venture to far flung nature. For commercial reasons these have been marketed as sixth form biology conservation trips - at least we now know the real reason.

Pedagogy & Teaching[edit]

A fearless educator.

Tom is particularly renowned for driving forward the modelling practice in science. An example of his brilliance is the modification to the old smarties electrical circuit loop. Tom's innovation: use grapes. Brilliant. Feedback after the lesson indicated that the student's were 17% more educated than those on the Smarties equivalent.

Tom also makes particularly good use of the Garamond font to increase the power of his presentations.

Wood's approach to learning doesn't stop in the classroom - not having a TV at home (has he told you that??) means that he fills his spare time with little projects. Learning the bass, making a bass pedal, and more recently, learning to row.

Rights to enforce school discipline[edit]

Tom is a part of the small band of teachers within the school who believe that wearing a hat indoors is an offence to polite society. In reality this practice is an attempt to bring some kudos back to the profession. Instead of bowing before teachers as they pass down corridors the students in the school now swipe their hats from their heads in deference as Mr. Wood stalks the corridor.

An assessment of the BfL data shows that WOT has issued 213 C3's for wearing hats indoors in an effort to enforce this.

Dress[edit]

A member of the Fortismere bow tie club Tom is a snappy dresser. It is widely accepted that Tom would never wear trainers or jeans on a school day.

Famous throughout the school for wearing his leather biker jacket, even though he sold his bike, Tom struts the school in a John Travolta style seeking out his Sandy. Outside of school he is an assiduous wearer of the good old fashioned vest top and check shirt combo - good preparation for his East London media future.

He is also renowned for sporting a good old fashioned Christmas jumper when the need arises.

Teacher Enthusiasm[edit]

See: Teaching around the World, Popular Educators

  • Endless
  • Inspirational
  • KS3 Co-ordinator in NQT year
  • Duke of Edinburgh
  • Numerous school trips
  • Involvement across the school
  • Biology Sixth Form Conservation field trips
  • CERN
  • National Science & Engineering Week Lectures
  • Friday morning science meetings

Tom WILL help everyone.

Misconduct[edit]

It is not known why, but Tom is a fan of dismissing his students with the salutation that he will 'see them the following Tuesday' ?

The use of puns in Tom's life in general is accepted by all to be generally criminal. Some famous (and over used) examples:

All other puns have been deleted from memory for sanity.

It is also known that Tom likes to have a teary moment from time to time. Especially over his stick insects.

Teaching around the world[edit]

Indonesia & Madagascar[edit]

Tom has led two trips for the Biology faculty. It was rumoured that he was in fact supposed to be taking a school trip to the cinema but ended up selflessly giving up his time to backpack, hike, scuba dive and using the flights to get closer to visiting family in far flung parts of the world, as well as missing the last week of school. This trip has also been useful for feeding his stick insect fetish.

Duke of Edinburgh[edit]

As well as an obsession with stick insects Tom is also a keen supporter of Prince Phillip and has spent many evenings and weekends searching for him in hills and mountains in the South Downs and Breacon Beacons respectively. For cover he has taken along students from across the school to aid him in this endeavour.

CERN[edit]

Tom's positive attitude towards 'never saying no to a trip' has also taken him to CERN, Geneva with students, where his ability to find the Higgs Boson drove several students to a drinking excess. A disappointing trip for him really though as there were no stick insects to collect.

Pendarren[edit]

More successful in terms of stick insects collected has been his visits to Pendarren.

Popular Educators[edit]

Tom is a well known popular educator and will shortly be releasing a book about his skills in this area.

A quick search of the comments left on ratemypopulareducator.com show the following:

  • I wood
  • i wood n't, yeah!
  • This man makes me cry with his beauty
  • Lets get Physical.....physical
  • Basically, yeh, this guy.... omg....
  • Morning, Wood!

See Also[edit]

References[edit]

External Links[edit]

Wood family at Christmas