Talk:S by Shakira/GA1

GA Review[edit]

The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.

Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer: Prism (talk · contribs) 18:22, 25 December 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Gift nº 3. :) Prism △ 18:22, 25 December 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Dude you're on a roll --WonderBoy1998 (talk) 18:43, 25 December 2013 (UTC)[reply]

General

Disambiguation links: Not present.
Checklinks: Correct these external links.

Corrected. --WonderBoy1998 (talk) 18:43, 25 December 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Original research: Not present.

In depth

1. Lead

I don't understand this sentence: "Along with the original perfume, S by Shakira Eau Florale was promoted by Shakira at a press release in Paris, France, in March 2013." What does this really mean? They were both promoted in the same press release?

I made it simpler to read now --WonderBoy1998 (talk) 18:43, 25 December 2013 (UTC)[reply]

2. Development 2.2. Scent and packaging

Remove quotation marks from blockquote and insert a dot in the end of it

Removed. --WonderBoy1998 (talk) 18:43, 25 December 2013 (UTC)[reply]

3. Release

"was available for purchase in more than 15,000 stores" → unclear. Worldwide?

I added the US part. --WonderBoy1998 (talk) 18:43, 25 December 2013 (UTC)[reply]

4. Flanker fragrances 4.1. S by Shakira Eau Florale 4.1.1. Background and scent

"packing" → packaging, no?

Whoops! --WonderBoy1998 (talk) 18:43, 25 December 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Final comments

Well, this will be even faster than the previous reviews. A very nice read! Prism △ 18:22, 25 December 2013 (UTC)[reply]

I can't thank you enough! You have cleared out so many of my pending reviews! I am drowning in debt! THANK YOU SO MUCH! --WonderBoy1998 (talk) 18:43, 25 December 2013 (UTC)[reply]

The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.