Talk:Naomi Osaka/GA1

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GA Review[edit]

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Reviewer: MWright96 (talk · contribs) 20:33, 8 March 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Shall review this article. MWright96 (talk) 20:33, 8 March 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks, MWright96! I just updated the article to reflect this year's results, so it should be ready to look at. Sportsfan77777 (talk) 01:10, 11 March 2019 (UTC)[reply]
  1. It is reasonably well written.
    a (prose): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):
  2. It is factually accurate and verifiable.
    a (reference section): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR):
  3. It is broad in its coverage.
    a (major aspects): b (focused):
  4. It follows the neutral point of view policy.
    Fair representation without bias:
  5. It is stable.
    No edit wars, etc.:
  6. It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
    a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
  7. Overall:
    Pass/Fail:

Lede[edit]

Early life and background[edit]

  • "while he was a college student from New York." - in
  • "with regard to the detailed plan Richard had developed for his kids." - informal; should be children
  • Wikilink Pembroke Pines and United States Tennis Association

2011–15: WTA Tour match win at age 16, top 150[edit]

  • "In September 2013, Osaka turned pro shortly before turning 16 years old" - professional
  • "These victories helped her break into the top 250 of the WTA rankings" - progress is more formal
  • " she upset world No. 19 Samantha Stosur" - use the {{abbr}} template on No. so readers hovering over it know it means number
  • Wikilink wild card to Wild card (sports)
  • Add a link to El Paso, Texas

2016: First WTA final, Newcomer of the Year, top 50[edit]

  • "Her results during this stretch were good enough to bring her onto the cusp of the top 100" - near to
  • "which allowed her WTA Tour-level events all year." - which allowed her to play in
  • "With this success, she cracked the top 100 of the WTA rankings for the first time." - progressed into
  • "She then did not play the grass court season after suffering an injury shortly after the French Open." - what type of injury?
    • The source I used doesn't specify, and I can't find it elsewhere. Sportsfan77777 (talk) 17:32, 11 March 2019 (UTC)[reply]

2017: Slight regression, two top 10 victories[edit]

  • "she did not win another main draw match on clay the rest of the season." - for the remainder

2018: US Open champion, Indian Wells title, world No. 4[edit]

  • "and extended her win streak one additional match in her first ever meeting against her childhood idol Serena Williams," - streak by one additional match
  • "where she lost to top seeded Barty in the semifinals." - to top seed
  • "she defeated Serena Williams for the second time this year to win her first major title." - in 2018
  • Wikilink hamstring injury to Pulled hamstring

Hopman Cup[edit]

Playing style[edit]

  • Wikilink forehand, serve and long rallies to their respective articles for non-Tennis readers

Coaches[edit]

  • "Following her tough loss at the 2016 US Open," - heavy to avoid editoralizing
    • Changed to "Following her loss at the 2016 US Open where she could not convert a 5–1 lead in the third set"
  • Wikilink Japan Tennis Association

Endorsements[edit]

  • Explain what IMG is to the casual reader
  • "Osaka is a brand ambassador for Japanese automobile manufacturer Nissan Motor" - just Nissan is sufficient

Personal life[edit]

  • "She has been described as various combinations of Japanese, Haitian, and American." - described by whom?
  • "while her mother spoke to her in Japanese." - change to conversed for variety and to avoid close reptition of the same word
  • "Her coach Sascha Bajin was initially confused by her personality," - this statement should be updated to reflect that Bajin is Osaka's former coach

References[edit]

  • References 6, 7, 12, 19, 24, 31, 45, 50, 54, 57, 60, 61, 64, 65, 66, 67, 72, 73, 79, 80, 81, 82, 86, 87, 92, 94, 95, 97, 98, 99, 100, 101, 102, 103 and 105 are missing the respective authors of their articles
  • References 94, 95 and 98 is missing the name of the magazine/newspaper
  • The newspaper in Reference 30 should be written as
  • Reference 33 needs to have Agence France-Presse as the agency who provided the news item
  • References 17, 18, 39, 63 and 83 are missing Associated Press as the agency who provided the story

Good work on the article. There is nothing that is too major to be addressed. MWright96 (talk) 13:18, 11 March 2019 (UTC)[reply]

MWright96, thanks for the review! I've addressed all of the comments above, and pretty much agreed with everything. Sportsfan77777 (talk) 18:02, 11 March 2019 (UTC)[reply]
@Sportsfan77777: Okay then. Am now able to promote the article to GA class. MWright96 (talk) 18:52, 11 March 2019 (UTC)[reply]
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