Talk:Little Sammy Sneeze

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GA Review[edit]

This review is transcluded from Talk:Little Sammy Sneeze/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: Seattle (talk · contribs) 18:00, 3 January 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Will start this review soon. Seattle (talk) 18:00, 3 January 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Introduction

  • that Sammy answered for his impropriety. this is slightly unclear; can you rework, possibly "answered" to "received punishment"?

Premise

  • Reads well.

Background

  • freelancing on the side "on the side" is idiomatic; can you rework? perhaps "occasionally"?
    • changed to "and also freelanced for humor magazines"---the freelancing wasn't very "occasional". Curly Turkey ¡gobble! 02:26, 6 January 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • From January 1904 he tried his and at a number of other short-lived strips I'm sorry, I don't quite follow; if the intended phrase was "tried his hand", I would prefer a rework, as that's idiomatic.
  • Changed to "created". Curly Turkey ¡gobble! 02:26, 6 January 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • McCay was noted not only for his exceptional drafting skills, but also his remarkable prolificacy. This sounds more subjective than empirical; can you include Bukatman's name in this sentence and perhaps rework to quote the main idea? Seattle (talk) 22:28, 4 January 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Style and analysis

  • Sammy's sneeze would build in the first four panels to a release in the fifth, and was met with the consequences in the sixth. reads awkwardly; it sounds like Sammy's sneeze was met with consequences, not Sammy himself.
  • (also 1904[13]) citation should be placed after end parenthesis.
    • I was afraid that might imply the preceding information was sourced to that page. I've fixed it and thrown in an extra inline to be sure. Curly Turkey ¡gobble! 02:26, 6 January 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • To Katherine Roeder no need for her given name here
  • [28]—one that, in Smolderen's words, "chuckles at the absurdity of ... doing the same thing ad nauseam". would prefer the reference after the quote
    • Actually, this was meant to be cited by the next inline. I've cited the quote now. Curly Turkey ¡gobble! 02:26, 6 January 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Publication history

  • Little Sammy Sneeze' began on 24 July, 1904 stray apostrophe; you use DMY dating throughout the article until here, why change?
  • as they would have at the time not sure "at the time" is necessary here; it's imprecise, and doesn't particularly add anything here.

Legacy

  • receiving little attention itself outside of a few key strips. what does this mean? why is "key" needed here? Seattle (talk) 22:28, 5 January 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Passing as a good article. Seattle (talk) 17:28, 7 January 2015 (UTC)[reply]

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